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Reaper of Souls is here and players
have flocked back to Diablo III to test out the new content, myself
included. As I happily hack and slash my way through hordes of
demons, undead, and inanimate objects that get in the way, I can only
imagine the horror some people would find in what I consider to be a
grand old time. You see, blaming games for transgressions taking
place in the real world is a big thing these days, with just about
everyone jumping on the band wagon.
With all that being said, any rational
gamer will tell you, that this is nothing short of pure codswallop.
Unless you already have a screw lose, you know that there are some
things you can do in game that you really probably shouldn't try out
in real life. Diablo III and it's predecessors have plenty of great
examples of that, some more harmless than others.
Read on to see my top 5 picks for
things I do in Diablo III that I probably shouldn't do in real life:
In the world of Diablo III, it is
perfectly acceptable to wander intro crypts, overturn corpses, and
otherwise pillage the dead. Nothing is sacred here. If you have
valuables on you and you happen to be no longer one of the living,
consider them no longer yours. Gold, trinkets, rings, even the
clothes off your back, will be casually taken by random adventurers
strolling through the world. There is no remorse here, only
satisfaction for having collected a new piece of loot.
Of course, in the real world it doesn't
quite work that way. People tend to get a little bent of shape if you
loot the dead bodies of their friends and family. Grave robbing is a
pretty serious offense in the real world. It will land you with a
felony on your record, jail time, and a hefty fine.
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Nothing brings me more joy in Diablo
than smashing random objects through the world. It doesnt matter
what it is, if it breaks I am all over it. Vases, tables,
bookshelves, torture devices, you name it, I've probably broken it.
Sometimes breaking these items even garners you a small gold reward,
making the breaking all the sweeter. There is nothing quite like the
utter satisfaction one gets from destroying things in game.
Breaking things in the real world,
especially things that don't belong to you, is not a good plan.
Imagine walking into an antiques shop, your friends house, or even
the local Walmart and just breaking things Diablo style. It is safe
to say that the owners would be pretty unhappy. It is likely that you
would end up having to pay for all the items broken and if the owners
were particularly grumpy, you may get spend some quality time with a
Looting Personal Belongings
In Sanctuary the NPCs just don't care
if you walk up in front of them and dig through their bags, chests,
or other personal storage spaces. A perfect example of this can be
found in Act I. Here players are introduced to Haedrig, the
blacksmith. Haedrig it seems, keeps his belongings in a cute little
chest just outside his forge. Of course, because this is a game, this
chest is lootable by the player. You can take what is inside and
Haedrig will say or do nothing to stop you.
Unfortunately, in the real world,
taking other people's things is totally unacceptable. You can't go
pillaging through your best friend's jewelry box or the local
convenience store and just walk out with you want. Your friend is
going to be pretty upset with you and as for the convenience store,
well, it would probably be another visit with that police officer we
talked about earlier. People can be so touchy in real life!
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Hired Hit Man
Speaking of Haedrig, it is this fellow
that starts your career in Diablo III as something of a hired hit man
(or woman). He begs you to assist you in killing off his wife, who
happens to be very close to turning into one of the walking dead. Of
course, you take on the task and poor, unfortunate Mira bites the
dust. This is just the beginning of a long line of people and
creatures that you are tasked to kill.
The job of a hired hit man in real life
is pretty frowned upon. People just don't approve and really, no sane
person would do it. You can't provide this service or pay for it
without suffering some serious consequences if you are caught. So
forget offing the old ball and chain, that kind of thing is reserved
for the in-game world only.
Kicking Down Doors
While this may fall under the vandalism
category, I thought it was significant enough to make the list all on
it's own. In Diablo III kicking down a door to enter a room is not
big deal. You do it almost continuously throughout the game.
Honestly, I think that considering you are a bad ass epic hero in the
game, there is no better way to make an entrance.
Of course, as with everything on this
list, kicking down a door to make your entrance is not something that
translates well to real life. First and foremost, people just don't
appreciate it. Not only does it make a huge mess and the door will
ultimately need repaired. Also, people don't really like others
bursting into their personal space, no matter how cool the entrance.
Even if you did find someone who would welcome this unusual way to
come inside, breaking a door isn't as easy as it looks in game.
Unless you are trained in marital arts, serious bodily injury would
be quite possible.
That wraps up my list of top 5 picks of
things I do in Diablo that I probably shouldn't do in real life. What are
some things you do in game that might be frowned upon in the
real world? Share them with us in the comments section below!
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