The World Cup begins today. Huzzah!!!

[24 Hours Ago (give or take when you read this...let's just call it yesterday shall we?)]

This edition of Loading... comes to you via "VIA" the passenger railway company of choice; because it's the only choice, in Ontario, Canada. It's like travelling through time on a cart with one square wheel being pulled by a near-sighted, three-legged goat suffering from African sleeping disease.

Ah, the relaxing clickity clack of steel wheels on steel rails. I love travel like I love a good kick in the crotch. Today is no different from any other travel day. It starts out on par for the course.

I walk down the aisle of the train to my assigned seat, the seat I paid for, to find it filled with a laptop, newspapers and wait for it... a bag of garbage. As I point to the seat and begin to tell the "gentleman" sitting next to it that I need him to move his refuse to a receptable he barks at me that there are "lots of empty seats". I'm inclined to tell him to pick one out and sit his obnoxious arse down in it, but I don't want to make a scene. I've only been on the train for 30 seconds. I will undoubtedly look like the jerk.

I drag my luggage down the aisle and find a seat. The two-hour tour aboard the good ship bounce-you-all-over-the-known-universe begins. I'm guessing that there must be some law that trains can't have shock absorbers. It must be an old law; pre-laptop and keyboard, because trying to type while the notebook bounces around like Anna Nicole Smith at a widowers' convention.

We don't have the technology to keep my insides from banging together, but we can put Wi-Fi on a train. I'm amazed, stunned and appalled, all the while doing my best Super Mario impression. If only I could bounce a little higher I know I could get gold coins to come out of the luggage compartment over my head.

Methost (I believe he is also known as the "freshmaker") commented yesterday that I write too much about World of Warcraft. He suggested Hello Kitty Online could perhaps make for an interesting column. I'm convinced that this is just Da Vinci-like code for some adult type MMO. I'll do my research and get back to you. In the meantime, wish me luck, or at least wish me luck yesterday as I bounce my way to a meeting in Toronto.

Keifer Sutherland was not harmed in the writing of this column.

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Now on to the real world. You can't make this stuff up.

As always, thanks for visiting TenTonHammer.com,
-- John "Boomjack" Hoskin

Last Updated: Mar 13, 2016

About The Author

Hoskin 0
Dissecting and distilling the game industry since 1994. Lover of family time, youth hockey, eSports, and the game industry in general.

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