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Our WoW Census Database now tracks over 1,068,000 characters! We still desperately need data for the following servers; Frostwold, Frostmane, Maelstrom, Detheroc, Dragonmaw, Shattered Hand, Perenolde, Kil'Jaeden and Bloodscalp. If you have time just login, wait for census to run, logout and upload the results. I'll be doing the same! The servers are sortable by date of release, timezone, population, ratio and more for those of you who like to track World of Warcraft statistics.

Archlord open beta has started. You can sign up here. If PVP is your thing then this title is probably worth the free sneak peek before you buy. If you would like more information on Archlord you are luck. We happen to have been covering it since it was gleam in the developers' eyes. If you can click, you can be up to date on Archlord.

Disney's ToonTown is launching in South East Asia.

"Singapore , September 20, 2006 – Walt Disney Internet Group (WDIG) today announced that its critically acclaimed Disney's Toontown Online, hailed as the first downloadable massively multiplayer (MMP) 3D online game for kids and families, will be available to kids and families in South East Asia in early 2007.

Through a marketing and distribution services deal with Philippines-based company Digital Media Exchange, Disney's Toontown Online will be distributed in The Philippines, Singapore, Malaysia and Vietnam in early 2007. The game will offer all of the same characters and unique game functionality as the popular U.S. version.

"Disney's Toontown Online is a prime example of how we successfully combine new technologies with inspired storytelling to create unique, interactive entertainment experiences for kids and families worldwide," said Duncan Orrell-Jones, senior vice president and managing director, Walt Disney Internet Group Asia Pacific. "WDIG has a significant, rapidly expanding mobile and online presence in the APAC region, and we're pleased to now work with Digital Media Exchange to bring this innovative, award winning game to families in South East Asia," added Mr. Orrell-Jones."

Most games developed for North American tastes need to be retooled and regionalized to satisfy the Asian market. Imagine if ToonTown was retooled to play like most Asian games.

I headed over to the ToonTown page to get some ammunition for my column and was greeted with this logo and the following:


This browser is not supported by Disney's Toontown Online.

Disney's Toontown Online requires Microsoft Internet Explorer version 5 or higher, running on a Windows PC.

If your website is so rigid that it won't display for Firefox, Opera or Safari then how likely is it that you geared your game to this very different and very vocal new market? When it comes to the tastes of the Asian MMOG player you had better deliver.

Since I was stopped at the ToonTown Online Web border by the Disney customs officials I decided to do what any unwanted immigrant would do. I stuck myself in a cartoon freght container with hundreds of other cartoon refugees and attempted to sneak in. Unfortunately, I climbed into the wrong container and ended up at a ToonTown wiki.

The first section that I noticed was "Battle Tips". This section effectively takes you to a page filled with gibberish, or perhaps with a page already tuned to the non-English speaking player.

Here's a little quip from "Battle Tips":

"Toon-Up Prioritization

Most obviously the method focusing on keeping the team to top Laff

* Load as many Toon-Ups as possible
* Wait until one or more team members are down at least 10 laff points, then utilize the proper Toon-Up
* During your standby phase, attack accordingly with Throw, Squirt, or Sound
* It is recommended that you have obtained at least the Bamboo Cane"

The bamboo cane is really the dead give-away that this game has been regionalized for the Asian market. I can't tell you how many times my EverQuest, EverQuest 2 or World of Warcraft immersion has been blown to pieces by some joker who decides to hit me with a bamboo cane.

And then I came across this:

"Before you head out, there are a few formulae you must understand.

Cog Vitality

A cog's vitality, equivalent to a toon's laff, is equal to (L+1) * (L+2), where L is the cog's level.


Level Four Cog
(4+1) * (4+2)
5 * 6

Level Eight Cog
(8+1) * (8+2)
9 * 10

Level Twelve Cog
(12+1) * (12+2)
13 * 14
182 (Changed to 200)"

Way too much information and why was the last bit of math "changed to 200" when the answer is really 182. Is that for the North Americans who can't multiply? I think the ToonTown folks are taking the racial sterotype that Asians are good at math a bit far. I suppose it could be the stereotype that North Americans can't handle math that was being pointed out, but either way, I'm against it.

I'm also against ducks who don't wear pants. Donald I'm looking at you. I don't want my kids playing a game that includes a pantless male with a speech impediment forcing them to make math mistakes while wielding a bamboo cane. It just isn't right.

That said, if you are living in South East Asia and are O.K. with pantless males then maybe ToonTown is for you!

Post a comment at the bottom of this blog. If you are shy (or female and sending in naughty pictures) you can E-Mail me.

Every good guild needs a home. A home free of gold ads, secondary market farmers. Look no further than GuildPortal.com.

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Vin Diesel Fact of the Day - Vin Diesel discovered how to make non-stick coatings stick the pans.
Now from the real world. You can't make this stuff up.

As always, thanks for visiting TenTonHammer.com,
-- John "Boomjack" Hoskin

Last Updated: Mar 13, 2016

About The Author

Hoskin 0
Dissecting and distilling the game industry since 1994. Lover of family time, youth hockey, eSports, and the game industry in general.