Uncle Lester may live in a van down by the river, but that doesnÂt mean he isnÂt a gamer at heart. Always on the lookout for an unsecured Wi-Fi connection to use before being runoff, his quest for gamer glory continues!
Hello and welcome to the first edition of Gaming with Uncle Lester! IÂm your host of todayÂs show, Uncle Lester. Ok. ThatÂs enough for introductions. TodayÂs show is brought to you through the magic of Wi-Fi. Specifically, unsecured Wi-Fi. If thereÂs any message I have for the old lady living at 1010 East Bagaboo Avenue in Talahassee, Florida, itÂs this Â pay no heed to the van with no windows parked in your driveway!
Any whoÂ gaming. ThatÂs the topic of my life and today weÂre talking about gamer food. More specifically, those funky flavored Harry Potter jellybeans. Have you tried these things? Worms, dirt, soap, grass, VOMITÂ the list goes on and on. My nephew sent me a care package with this the other day and I was ecstatic. One, that I got anything at all, but two, that he remembered my love of jellybeans.
What gamer doesnÂt like a good bean of jelly goodness? And before you ask, yes, I did read the label before eating the one that said vomit, but letÂs be real here for a moment. No one in their right mind would ever think a company could sell anything that genuinely tasted like vomit. So I ate it. And promptly proceeded to gag and spit for what seemed like an hour. It tasted exactly like vomit.
I may not have the best gig in the world, being unemployed and always on the lookout for the next Wi-Fi signal, but at least IÂm not getting up every day and going in to work to see if the next batch of vomit jellybeans has just the right amount of fresh bile in it.
ThatÂs it for todayÂs show but tune in tomorrow for more nuggets of awesome sauce! Be sure to follow me on Twitter at @UncleLesterWIFI too or send me an email with your gamer topic at [email protected]!