[Ed: Please welcome Jeff "Ethec" Woleslagle to the TTH main team. Jeff will be helping me post news, views, and other shmooze. A big round of clap for Jeff.]
Subbing in for your favorite news block-jock and mine, I hope you'll tolerate a little news from Ethec and my sub-par sense of humor today. For a better laugh than I could ever deliver, check out Neddie Seagoon's Guide to MMOG Terminology. If you've ever played, you'll be in tears. And stitches... tears and stitches. We're not responsible for lasting effects, except of course the good ones.
Ten Ton Hammer Search Tool - One click. All the Info.
Now on to the real world, you can't make this stuff up.
- Polish boy comes close to bombing bank over poor service.
Please, no jokes about the bank pulling the pin and throwing it back.
- Bill to impose a 25% Federal Internet Porn Excise Tax.
Persistant pop-up advertisers fear bankruptcy. Free pic trawlers rejoice.
- Microsoft continues to lose money on Xbox.
Strangely, the announcement coincides with the lack of news regarding Xbox first-to-market game launches.
- Wal-Mart dumps its singles shopping program.
Always low giggity, always.
- Man fleeing from police runs into courthouse.
Next, the man reportedly handcuffed himself and climbed into the nearest jail cell, boasting about his narrow escape.
- Skateboarder branded by hot manhole cover sues.
In related news, utility companies rush to embellish their manholes with disturbing artwork and skater verbage.
- Tech Stocks Booming Again?
Bubble bursting pin of reality V2.0 appears on horizon.
- Robots Vie For Poker Champ Title
All hail our new Robot Poker Champ overlords.
- GROW or die
Proving addictive games don't need to be fancy.
- Monster Dust Cloud Heads For U.S.
Godzilla and Mothra exit Japan, head towards Florida.
- Fold a Dollar Bill Into a Shirt
For those days when you have $1 too many.
- Armstrong Wins 7th Tour De France
Both people who care cheer. The French surrender amidst piles of poodle poop.