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Welcome to the 825th Edition of Loading...

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Daily Column

Loading... making you feel like every day is launch day.

First, the Ten Ton Pulse, your finger on the beating heart of the MMOG industry.

If the Top 10 isn't enough, we now show the Top 20 and Top 50 lists as well, available to everyone on our homepage. (What is Pulse?)

Age of Conan - 200 BPM
World of Warcraft - 49 BPM
Lord of the Rings Online - 18 BPM
EverQuest 2 - 14 BPM
Guild Wars - 14 BPM
EVE Online - 13 BPM
Warhammer Online - 12 BPM
Lineage 2 - 12 BPM
Vanguard - 8 BPM
Tabula Rasa - 8 BPM

[Contest Update: Apparently we have lots of old-school Styx fans, because we've given away 651 DOMO keys so far. Thank you Mr. Roboto. The other side of the coin is our $1100 Wonderland giveaway where only nine (it's a number so small that I don't even represent it with its numeral equivalent) have signed up to win. I'm going to really take a real flyer here and write that your chances of winning are pretty damn good.]

In keeping with a theme, bowing to 'The Pulse' and for the sake of keeping you current I give you this little bit of joy from Funcom.

"As some of you might have heard, we’re kicking off the launch for Age of Conan with a barbaric gathering here in Oslo. We’re doing this in two stages on Tuesday May 13th .

During the day, at 12:00 CET, we ’re doing a presentation of the game at Latter Aker Brygge where we will show the game’s exclusive features and content. Seating is limited and is reserved for journalists, but we will have quite a few extra seats for some of Oslo’s Age of Conan fans. We can’t guarantee a seat, but if you meet up outside Latter on Aker Brygge at 12:00 CET, there might be a chance for you to get in!

In the evening we’re hosting a huge party in Holmenkollen – one of Norway’s key national wonders – where we’re building an entire Cimmerian war camp to honor the release of our game (and possibly wage war on the evil wizard inhabiting the tower!). And guess what? Those of you who actually get into the presentation during the day will have a chance of also being invited to the party in Holmenkollen!

Again, seating at the presentation is limited and so is access to the party. But with some luck you might be one of those who get to send Age of Conan into history!

By Crom! This will rock!"

We will have boots on the ground in Norway, attending on behalf of the millions of TenTonHammer faithful. If you have questions for the Funcom team, can tell us how to pronounce 'Latter Aker Brygge' or 'Holmenkollen' or can say something witty and insightful in Norwegian then we'd love to hear from you.

For those of you keeping score, my beta experience yesterday was again a pleasant one. My Priest of Mitra (which doesn't have a bloody class rep yet, so get cracking people!) is rocking Tortage, repulsing the inhabitants, smiting the evil doers and wondering why every female has enormous hooters. I'm certainly not against this aesthetic choice, but apparently somebody is.

Stringo0, the person who has started the petition to toggle nudity belongs to this guild, which has the following posted on their landing page.

"We don't normally do this, but I think this is an area where we can stand up for Christian ethics in the gaming community.

I think this is an important issue for Christians who are thinking about playing this game. I for one do not like any form of nudity in a game because I think it creates lustful thoughts, and negates the experience for me.

Here are Jesus's words:

Matthew 5:27-29 - Adultery

"You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery.' But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell."

Religious freedom and all that, blah, blah, blah. Get it out of your system now. I'm not attacking religion, though I often feel that I should be. This same guild, which claims to want a nudity toggle because of their Christian values doesn't seem to have a problem with decapitation or killing. I don't get it.

Here's what I think.

First they came for the boobs
and I did not speak out (nor did Coyote)
for I was not a boob.
Then they came for the non-Christian references
and I did not speak out
for I was not a non-Christian reference.
Then they came for the fighting
and I did not speak out
for I was not a fighter. (I play a healer. Priest of Mitra baby!)

Then they came for me
and there was no one left
to speak out for me.

With due credit to Pastor Martin Niemöller.

It's a slippery slope. At least they only want "an option to turn off all nudity". Why nudity is worse than killing is beyond me however. Somebody explain this to me!

There is another game, off on the horizon, a speck against the rising sun that is dripping out information in dribs and drabs. Matt of Warhammer-Portal.de sent me links to some videos of said game. I'll let you guess what it is. If you can understand German or if you are like me and just giggle away when you hear it, then leave the sound on while you check out these two videos at Warhammer-Portal.de. The first is PvP in the Talabec-Dam scenario and the second is a battle of German websites, Warhammer-Portal versus War-Welten. Warning! I don't speak German, so I have no idea if these guys are telling you to spend time with your mother or to 'spend time with your mother' if you know what I mean. You may just want to turn the sound off.

Until tomorrow. The Loading Forums await you. Do you feel the need to contact me personally with naughty pictures or derogatory comments? Here's my E-mail.

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[A big thanks to Phil Comeau for putting together the links, headlines and taglines.]

9 new MMOG hand-crafted articles today! 73 in May! 1092 in 2008!

New MMOG Articles At Ten Ton Hammer Today

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