Ten Ton Hammer - Taking MMO Gamers to the Next Level!

Welcome to the 1,083rd Edition of Loading...

Loading... is the premier daily MMORPG news and commentary newsletter, only from Ten Ton Hammer.

From the dawn of time, competitive types have always found creative ways to show off their successes. Whether it's an armory full of the weapons of your enemies or- the modern counterpart- a screenshot of your Darkfall bank, today's newsletter salutes purely player-devised ways of showing off in Loading... Showoff.

Coyote is back in a big way at Ten Ton Hammer, and his daily column explores all things geek with Coyote's trademark wit in It's All Geek to Me. Read it daily at Ten Ton Hammer! Today's topic: All jobs suck... some just sound a bit cooler than others (unless you're a porn star).

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Recent MMO Releases 4/28 - Free Realms (launch date) 5/11 - Chronicles of Spellborn 1.0.4 - "Scrolls of Keys and Courage" (patch) 5/15 - EVE Online Apocrypha 1.2 (patch) 5/19 - Warrior Epic (launch date) 5/19 - Vanguard "Halls of Pantheon" (content patch) 5/22 - Dragonica (CBT key giveaway)

Upcoming Releases 6/23 - Jumpgate Evolution (release date) 10/1 - Champions Online (NEW release date)

Important Dates 5/30 - Final block of BlizzCon 2009 tickets on sale. 6/2 - 6/4 - E3 2009

The Pulse

You vote with what you view at Ten Ton Hammer, and the result is the Ten Ton Pulse (What is Pulse?).

Here's today's top 5 Pulse results for today:

1. World of Warcraft
2. Lord of the Rings Online (UP 2)
3. Warhammer Online
4. EverQuest 2 (down 2)
5. Age of Conan: Hyborian Adventures (down 1)

Biggest Movers in the Top 20 today:

1. Jumpgate Evolution (UP 8 to #13)
2. Alganon (down 5 to #17)
3. Star Wars: The Old Republic (UP 2 to #11)

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Loading... Daily

Darkfall is a harsh game, we know this. Any MMO that lets you loot your dead PvP right down to the spleen automatically qualifies as hardcore. We also know that gloating is at least half the fun of any victory - case in point: three generations later there's still an entire entertainment industry built around Nazi Germany's downfall. Forget war reparations, lost territory, and the like.... we have at least a dozen big budget games a year and a action-suspense plotline well in Hollywood that will probably never run dry.

So in a game such as Darkfall, how can you safely gloat about your many victories while retaining your spleen? Forget scoreboards and XBLA-style achievements, these might have their place in other games but will always seem a little tacked-on... especially now that it seems like you get a WoW achivement for walking outside with your pants on.

All your DF stuff are belong to this guy.

The decidedly low-tech, Web 1.0 solution: post a screenshot of your bank in the forums. Like this one.

Pure genius, really. Showing off your hoarde in a game like Darkfall means you've somehow kept your stuff while mercilessly looting others' (or you're hacking one of the least secure games on the market, but that's another discussion), and there's really no way to counter it unless your screenshot shows off a bigger hoarde.

I was trying to think of other, purely player-devised ways of showing off their skills in a very public way. Screenshots and videos of players killing "unkillable" enemies probably top the list, such as the infamous assassination of Lord British in Ultima Online or The Sleeper in EverQuest, where it took 200 players four hours to off the 100,000,000,000 hitpoint mob. Being there when the seemingly impossible happens makes you a more interesting conversationalist for life, and this is yet another thing that's true in games and in real life.

How else have gamers shown that they can do the seemingly impossible, or just found creative ways to show off, in the games you've played? That's the topic in today's Loading... thread, weigh in!

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Shayalyn's Epic Thread of the Day

From our Tavern of the Ten Ton Hammer Forum

Have You Played WoW?

12 Million MMO Gamers Dig It. Do You?

CelestialLord wants to know if he's the only MMOG player who's never played World of Warcraft, and he's posted a poll to find out. While the poll doesn't exactly have an option for people like me who played through the free trial, and even subscribed for a month due to peer pressure, it could still prove telling. As the poll stands at the moment, half of the voters currently play WoW and only a handful have never played it.

Does this mean that WoW is still the MMOG standard by which all others are judged? Most of us know of Godwin's Law, which says that as any online discussion grows longer the probability of comparisons to Hitler or Nazis approaches. I say there should be a similar law that says when any MMOG manages to launch the probability of comparisons (whether favorable or unfavorable) to WoW is virtually assured.

Whatever your stance on WoW, go vote and let us know if you've played the game, or if you're among the minority who've never bowed before the 800 pound MMOGorilla.

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Awesome Quotes from the Epic Thread

"Played it at the headstart, through the horrible horrible server problems that everyone likes to think never happened because WoW was so perfect always, got to level 30ish, got bored and quit.

Started again around March, played to about 48 with a partner, then quit due to how complete ass the social environment was."

- Reavi
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Have you spotted an Epic Thread on our forums? Tell us!

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5 new MMOG hand-crafted articles today! 65 in May! 591 in 2009!

New MMOG Articles At Ten Ton Hammer Today [Thanks Phil Comeau for links and Real World News]

• EVE Online: Sins of a Solar Spymaster #12 - Proxy Wars - The Fall of ISS
  After taking some time to recover from his Las Vegas drinkfest, the Mittani recollects another politically infused EVE Online tale of treachery in this week's edition of Sins of a Solar Spymaster. Enjoy this story, because there's plenty more where that came from just waiting in the brain of our resident master of intrigue. It's definitely worth the read!
• Silkroad Online: Legend IV Tour
  Silkroad Online might be set in the 7th century but don't believe for a second it won't give you a modern day beating if you aren't careful.  Promoting a three pronged faction system it brings PvP to medley of destruction and mayhem.  Ten Ton Hammer had the opportunity to take a look at their newest dungeon and it lives up to the Silkroad tradition with a maze, difficult creatures, and epic encounters.  Find out what is waiting in store for you.
  
• geeked: Could Hell Be Any Worse?
  Ten Ton Hammer's very own satirical webcomic on all things geek-related is back in its 56th edition. Bill's somehow managed to reanimate the corpse of Adam's dead grandfather, and the two couldn't be happier to have a new member of the household. But how does Pappy feel about it? Be sure to catch up on any issues of Geeked you've missed by visiting our Comics Portal. Don't forget to rate your favorites while you're at it!
• EverQuest 2: Anashti Sul Miracles Guide
  Deciding which deity will better suit your EverQuest II class can be quite the task, but it really doesn't have to be! Ten Ton Hammer has guides for every single deity in game and with each guide comes a full list of miracles and blessings that allow you to determine which deity is for you. The latest and final deity guide to round out our lineup is the Anashti Sul Miracles and Blessings Guide. As a menacing and vengeful god, only the truly evil may choose to worship her but if she does accept you into the fold, you will be rewarded greatly!
• World of Warcraft: Hunter Raiding Gear
  Naxxramas has a huge assortment of shiny loot for the hunter looking to gear up for harder raids, but sifting through all that loot can be a long and tedious process and putting together the perfect set can take even longer. This week we take a look at some of the gear from Naxxramas that will benefit the hunter and some of the more popular items for this class.
  
  Hot Content - Or, what I took a fancy to:

1. World of Warcraft: Multiboxing Guide
2. Warhammer Online: Premium Member Q&A at Baltimore Games Day 2009
3. Lord of the Rings Online Interview with Jeffrey Steefel - Book 8 and Don Guldur
4. Comic: Geeked - "A New Old Friend"
5. Alganon Class Interview #4 - The Healer
6. Exclusive Interview with R.A. Salvatore
7. EVE Online: Sins of a Solar Spymaster #11- EVE and Loathing in Las Vegas
8. Warhammer Online: Land of the Dead Preview at Baltimore Games Day
9. Warhammer Online: Land of the Dead Q&A Video
10. geeked: A Wee Bit Creepy
11. Loading... Live #16 - Aion Dev Chat Podcast

Real World News

• Australia man charged over marsupial bow attacks
  Authorities are unsure exactly who it was that armed the animals with bows in the first place, but the man wrongfully charged has vowed that they will roo the day they strung him along.
• Woman injured by toppled tombstone
  A coded note was found nearby that they believe claims responsibility for the act; local authorities had to call in the FBI, as they couldn't de-crypt it themselves.
• China to get 'sex theme park'
  Interest is expected to be high for the Scat O’logical Log Ride, Mao’s Tunnel of Love, and the Diseased Shanghai Whore flume ride.
  

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Thanks for visiting the Ten Ton Hammer network!

-Jeff "Ethec" Woleslagle and the Ten Ton Hammer team