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Sins of a Solar Spymaster #17: The Archive of Tears

Posted Wed, Jun 24, 2009 by The Mittani

Just when you thought the Goons couldn't get any worse, they go and post porn. Not real porn, mind you, but EVE Online "chat porn" that typically features long-winded forum posts or in-game rants by opposition leaders. Thanks to the ingenuity of the Goonswarm spies, they've collected a large number of these porn posts, and the Mittani recollects a few of them for us in his latest edition of "Sins of a Solar Spymaster."

Espionage in EVE is typically done to provide strategic intelligence to an alliance's leadership or for raw profit. But that's not entertaining enough for the GIA. Not only do our agents serve an intelligence function, but they also keep an ear to the ground to acquire the finest 'chat porn' - the posts of our enemies, wailing and gnashing their teeth in the face of our war machine. Over the years, we've collected an inordinate amount of chat porn. Some of it is fairly mundane - the bromides and rationalizations people typically ward themselves with to cope with defeat. But every now and then, truly exceptional examples crop up. For your sadistic enjoyment, they are reprised here: the Archive of Tears. If you're not a griefer at heart, you might want to stop reading; This isn't pretty.


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