Happy Saint Patrick's Day! Wear something green, drink green beer, eat green chicken wings... on second thought, don't eat those, they've been in the fridge since January. Legend has it that St. Patrick, the patron saint of Ireland, banished all the snakes from the country. Unfortunately, he appears to have banished them to the E3 Media Pass Application Office. How many times do we have to re-submit? OH, we can't read that one, send another copy. This article doesn't qualify, that article doesn't qualify... Send another ID picture, you don't look good in this one!
WTF? What's next? Do you want my first-born, or my uber l33t Druid on Malfurion? 'Cause you can't have the druid, I'm raiding this weekend.
Just a head's up, if you see an media-passless angry bald guy in the LA Convention Centre cafeteria this May, surrounded by laptops and interview schedules, he probably needs a coffee. Or pie. I like... I mean, 'he' likes pie.
I *do* believe in E3 Media Badge fairies. I do, I do!
What's New On TenTonHammer.com?
Let us entertain you or at the very least waste some of your time at work.
- Differences Make the Virtual World Go 'Round
For any new MMORPG to succeed, it must differentiate itself from other, similar games. Mercurie takes a look at Vanguard: Saga of Heroes and how Sigil Games Online is making their game different than any previous game in the same
- DDO Tactics Series: The Bard
Those who can, bard. The bard is a pivotal character in any party. Not confined to a single role, bards can bring melee damage, spells, cures, and Ability increases to a party in Dungeons & Dragons Online: Stormreach (DDO).
- Auto Assault Crafting and Refining
For the refined crafter, we offer a new 'Refining and Crafting' section. The second in a three part series of updates to Auto Assault @ TenTonHammer's new crafting guide, the Crafting and Refining section goes over how to actually fix those broken treasures in your inventory. Not only that, but it contains a list of every component and commodity in the game!
- PVP First Impressions
Player on player violence: good, clean fun? We think so. They say its all fun and games until somebody loses an eye. In this case, its not really fun and games until somebody is laying face down in Antonica with you laughing while you loot their corpse. Aren't sure what the newly-added PvP server is like in EverQuest 2? RadarX shares his experiences and examines what differentiates this from the normal servers.
- EQ2's Power Rangers!
The Rangers took quite a beating last Live Update. Slide debuts his EQ2 TenTonHammer cartoon with his take on what exactly happened with a behind-the-scenes look at the nerfing process. Laugh along with us at EQ2 - TenTonHammer!
- EQ2 - Paladin Guide Update
Want to destroy bad guys like a medieval Chuck Norris? Then try something else! If you want to smite evil and fill a vital group role, then the Paladin is for you. And we've just updated the Paladin guide! Savanja has the latest on the new level 1-20 spells, 61-70 spells, and new zones.
- Guild Wars: Backstage Pass - Adventures in Seattle
"Recently, ArenaNet hosted a press event at the Sci-Fi Museum in Seattle. The guest of honour was the new expansion, Guild Wars Factions, and the release date of April 28th was announced to an enthusiastic crowd. I attended the event, and share the details of my trip with you in this personal editorial."
- Dungeons and Dragons Online: Tavern Pickup Line Resource
"So you've had your fill of high adventure for the day, and you just want to heal up and let off some steam in the local tavern, right? Suddenly you fasten your gaze on a foxy elf / strapping barbarian across the room. Your guildmates might call you directionally-challenged, they might call you a little weak in the character sheet department, but they can never say your one to pass up a promising encounter. You set down your tankard, slide off your stool with a flurry, and saunter towards the apple of your eye. But as you arrive and his/her eyes drift to yours, you realize... you've got nothing. That's where TenTonHammer comes in, my friend. We've got pages and pages of one-liners to help you improve your in-game game!"
- Vanguard: Saga of Heroes - New Artwork - Dreadknight
"A dark elf Dread Knight, making his way through a dank swamp region on his armored horse."
Vin Diesel Fact of the Day:
Iran refuses to abandon their nuclear weapons program, as they believe it is their only defence against Vin Diesel.
This is where I put it... but, I have a meeting in 10 minutes. No silly news for you!
As always, thanks for visiting TenTonHammer.com,
-- Phil "Ralphedel O'Minius" Comeau