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Video of the Day: You Can't Unsee This

Posted Tue, Aug 06, 2013 by Shayalyn

Ten Ton Hammer Video of the Day

I got nothin'

I want you to see the things our news guy, Martuk, does to torment me. I ask him to send me videos he finds when he's scouring for news, and he's great at that. But every now and then he throws in something...weird. I'm pretty sure he does it just to see how I'll react. Or maybe he's interested in seeing me have a little fun with it in this feature, but...I'm going to assume the former. Keep that in mind when you see today's video, because this came straight from Tuk's inbox to mine.

Now, I've got to admire Alice's enthusiasm at the beginning of this video. She really does think she's on to something. Those online roleplaying games we all love are "really fun and addictive," but it would appear they're either for kids, or they're porny. So, what do you do to avoid being "stuck at the kiddie table" or "up to your eyeballs in porn?" You play Venus Rising, of course.

Wasn't that fun? I simply can't help but think of Venus Rising as Penis Rising. Because I'm 12 years old. And apparently a boy. (But not really, although penises do still make me giggle, which has resulted in some awkward third dates.)

Also, I can't really show you Venus Rising without showing you this LARPing promo, which is deliciously cheesy and reminiscent of bad porn. (Sorry, Alice, that makes it "porny" as well as corny, even though we see no genitalia. Thank the gods.) These poor guys, they're certain that they're gonna get their fornication on in some fantastic Roman orgy, and...yeah. The guy on the couch to the right is thinking, "Well, that was a total waste of guyliner."

If all that has your juices flowing (ahem), you can learn more about Venus Rising at helpvenusrise.com. (Don't do the Freudian thing and accidentally type helppenisrise.com. I have not tested it, and I am not responsible for the result it returns. Fair warning.) Also, be sure to check out the game info page and get a load of (I swear I can't help the puns) the Poseidon concept art. Again, fair warning--what is seen cannot be unseen.

You're welcome, people. And while you're at it, you should also thank Martuk in the comments section below.


If you've got a video you'd love to see featured as our Video of the Day, drop me a link at shayalyn[AT]tentonhammer.com. You can also tweet me @ShayalynTTH on Twitter.


Once you see Poseidon, you can't unsee Poseidon. ROFL

My job is often very tedious visiting a massive number of websites daily for news, so when Shay asked me to start sending some of the more interesting things I find, how could one not see that as a golden opportunity to have some tormentive fun? =p

The guy in black does have a comical undertone to him at the end. I wonder if that story has a happy ending. ~ducks the tomatoes~

They evidently never played Age of Conan.

Sneaky edit: seeing the centaur lady reminds me of an evil prank I played on a friend at a major lab event. I made an empty folder and called it "horse pr0n", went onto Google image search and found the first 2 images I could find of horses beside each other, innocently, and placed them into the folder. I then copied the folder into each and every shared folder my friend had. Then I put on a shocked face and squealed "omg *friend's machine's name* has horse pr0n". The entire hall went silent, then laughter then people chanting back and forward "horse pr0n" in increasingly excited voices as they "found" it. Nearly 2 years later and he still has the name of "horse pr0n", but he doesn't allow his shared folders to be written to anymore.

AoC mostly only dabbled in topless women. I think this one is endeavoring to go a bit further with discreet virtual encounters or full blown Roman orgies.

Funny enough, Shay may become traumatized if I ever sent her some of the "other stuff" that I've come across from time to time. Though this one was a while back - Second Life unicorn babies. Let's just say that you didn't get them from a pet shop and leave it at that.

That is a creative prank. Harsh, but creative. You may want to watch it. That's the sort of thing you might spend years plotting revenge for. lol

True enough, but it definitely wasn't for kids. But I guess there are plenty more levels in this magical middle-ground they are aiming for.

As for revenge, he loves it, it has become a tradition at this lan (quarterly event) to have one of the teams named "team horse pr0n", but aside from that, I am actually in the process of migrating internationally, best way to escape revenge!

Gah!!! Autocorrect!! LAN not lab.

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