Howdy, partners! Welcome to the Snake Gulch Dude Ranch!

My name is Belle Steele, and I'll be your guide to all there is to see
and do in the Wild West!

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Snake Gulch is full
of robots.

My daddy's a fella by the name of Tyrell Donaldson, and he created
Snake Gulch to give all your tourist folk a chance to play the 1864
way! But since it ain't 1864 no more, he made some …
accommodations for
modern technology.

I'll let you in on our little secret: All the residents of Snake Gulch
are robots. Yep, robots. My daddy made 'em, and they're something to
see! The sheriff 'round these parts has got more than a tin star, he's
got a whole dang tin body!

You do me a favor and don't tell none of the cowboys what you know.
They think they're real cowboys, and it wouldn't be right to hurt their
feelings.

Now, I'm happy ya'll are here and all, but I've got to warn ya: This
ain't the best time to be visiting Snake Gulch. And I'd best tell you
good folk what happened.

Things were pretty fine here at Snake Gulch for a long time. We had
lots of visitors having fun and learning to rope and ride –
the saloon
and the hotel on Main Street were full every night! But then
… well,
it's been mighty tough around these parts for the past few years.

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According to Belle
Steele, Snake Gulch has a problem with robotic snakes.

First the government moved alla them there supervillain types into the
mountain over yonder, and tourists don't take to being within a stone's
throw of a prison. We kept goin' as best we could, but when Grond
showed up and started smackin' four people at once, well, that was
pretty much the end of the good times down here at Snake Gulch.

It was real quiet down here for a long time, and we'd gotten used to
being by ourselves. Then these here snake fellas moved in, and that's
when things went from bad to plumb terrible.

They're some real desperados, they are, and they've done something to
the good folk of Snake Gulch. Turned 'em mean. You better watch your
step in Snake Gulch these days – you make the wrong move, and
some
ornery cowpoke might just fill your hide fulla lead!

I don't like them snake types at all. What cowpokes they didn't make
crazy, they took to the junkyard! They're rebuilding some of the
robots, and I don't even want to see what they're gonna make. Murder
machines … it's just awful!

These are some sad, sad days in Snake Gulch. And unless you've got a
hankering to strap on a six-gun and clean up the town, I'd advise you
to mosey along.