25 Signs That You May Be Playing Too Much EverQuest II

EQ2 Humor by Coyote

If you eat too many carrots, your skin will turn yellow.

If you eat too many tomatoes, your skin will turn red.

If you play too much EverQuest II....

...you end up on the phone with your buddy Shipwreck and the two of you come up with a list of ....

25 Signs That You may Be Playing Too Much EverQuest II

1) After being mugged in a dark alley you write a nasty letter to your city's Mayor demanding that muggers be nerfed because there is no way that four low level thugs should be able to take a level 70 Shadow Knight.

2) You've accidentally greeted a friend more than ONCE with "Hail.."

3) You have sat around with your friends and assigned class and level to real world figures. "I could beat the Pope." "No way dude, the Pope is EASILY a level 70 three up Heroic Templar!"

4) When looking for the arcade in the mall, you've actually (for a split-second) "seen" a waypoint trail.

5) Your boss demands that you redo the marketing strategy guide for the next quarter because your suggestion of "Using the mailroom clerks to Zerg them" has been rejected.

6) While going through a messy divorce, you laugh at your spouse getting "half" because the lawyer foolishly forgot to include plat and in-game items.

7) It takes you two hours to get ready to go to work, but when raiding you can use the bathroom, prepare a meal, pour yourself a glass of soda, set the DVR to record your favorite movies and take out the garbage all within about seventeen seconds.

8) You haven't used your hands to pick up a dropped pen in over two years, and your "Monkey Toes" are so over developed that your shoes no longer fit properly.

9) You had to turn down a date with the that hot chick from marketing because your guild was raiding new content that night and you need the DKP.

10) You actually put down on your resume that you had a "Server Wide First" and then go into detail about the event.

11) You once (even in your head or to yourself) converted the change in your pocket to in game currency. (Quarter = Plat, Dime = Gold, Nickel = Silver, Penny = Copper)

12) Your E-Harmony profile states in large bold letters "NO WORLD OF WARCRAFT PLAYERS!"

13) While driving to work you come up with and design in your head an "Auto-follow" feature to work with your "Cruise Control".

14) Red Bull not only gives you wings, but they send you cards on your Birthday and Christmas.

15) You still think that your spouse was being unfair, and that "Lucan" is a good STRONG name for a boy.

16) After sex you snuggle up to your partner and ask in a playful voice..."So, did you Ding?"

17) You don't worry about getting STD's or other diseases because all your "cures" are at master one.

18) You're convinced that your co-worker's bad breath is a frontal AoE and have tried to get others to "turn him" during meetings.

19) You've been involved in serious debates on whether or not you can legally "backstab" with a fountain pen.

20) You've reported to your spouse that your lawn is "bugged" because you have repeatedly harvested every rock, shrub, and root - but have yet to get a rare.

21) You can't remember the exact date of your 6 year old's birthday, but upon looking at the screen your child can tell you the level, class, race, name, and "history" of the character you are playing.

22) You spend hours trying to find your name on novelty mugs and key chains only to realize that you were looking up your character.

23) You refer to your near death experience as the time you went "link dead".

24) Your wrist watch alarm is set to go off the moment a "lock out timer" expires in game.

25) You just counted up how many things you've done on this list and are now paranoid that Ship and I may be watching you.

~End~


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Last Updated: Mar 13, 2016

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