Twenty Signs That Your Friends Just Bought Rise of Kunark

EQ2 Humor by Coyote

Now that the new expansion has been out for a while, those of us who have played it have begun to notice some slight changes in our friends and guild mates. These changes have been attributed to the new game experience RoK brings, and for better or for worse are beginning to form extremely visible patterns of behavior.

Maybe you recognize some of the symptoms, or maybe you yourself are exhibiting them. Either way, chances are you are beginning to recognize;

"Twenty Signs That Your Friend Is Now Playing Rise of Kunark"

* He has been logged in 22 hours a day for the last three weeks straight, but has only been in a group twice.

* Whenever a "Flask of Water" drops from a mob he laughs about the "suckers who don't read the fine print" and drops it on broker for 8 gold.

* You watched him get 11 AA points in the span of seven minutes without leaving his inn room.

* He has a full set of fabled gear and 107 AA's....on his level 16 character.

* You ask him if he wants to farm nodes together and he asks you if you want him to stab you in the face.

* Plat farmers give him a wide berth and have accused him more than once of "ruining the game".

* Real life pain, love, sorrow, or even death cannot make him cry - but them moment he heard that you could now harvest while being attacked he wept like a child.

* Because of his rare harvests, AA points, level gains, and legendary drops, you've seen the word "grats" over six hundred and fifty thousand times in the last two hours.

* He calls anyone under 80 a "frickin' n00b" and refuses to group with them.

* Whenever he opens his quest journal the server crashes.

* He's got so much extra plat to spend that his mount is equipped with "spinners" and a full set of "Grillz".

* He refers to the Fens as "that stupid n00bie zone".

* You've actually watched him undercut his alt on broker.

* You can get him to swear in guild chat and log off of the game in disgust just by saying the words "Epic Weapon".

* He's played non-stop for three weeks, but has yet to see any content past the Drachnid Caves.

* He refers to "Evac" as "downtime" and can eat an entire dinner and use the bathroom before the spell is finished casting.

* When asked, he will lie about what instance of a zone he is in because he doesn't want even one more person harvesting "his" nodes.

* He got his Rhino by creating a guild made entirely out of his alts and power leveling it to 70.

* He loudly proclaims the awesomeness of Frostfell and its events - just to get people out of the zone so that he can harvest in peace.

* He's already complaining about lack of content and sending daily e-mails to the devs asking for a release date on the next expansion.

~end~