[Edit: Thanks to Khatie for finding and reporting the myriad of spulling errirs in the column today]
Happy Labour Day, especially to any women who happen to be in labour and yet still found the time to read this column. Consider me your virtual epidural.
Labour Day, the day of the year in North America when only the most essential services are on the job. There are some professions that are so essential that a day off is just not in the cards. Hospital personnel, police officers, firefighters, those that serve in the military, fast-food counter clerks and gaming site editors all apparently fit into that section if the workforce.
Let's face it, if you are hurt, chased by killer bees, caught in a fire, being invaded, need a Big Mac or just have to know all about the recent theft in EVE Online you need assistance immediately. These are situations where waiting a day just won't do and could be life threatening.
Though I would like to think that what I do here at TenTonHammer.com is akin to a police officer or a paramedic I have to believe that it fits in there with the grease jockey at the local Wendy's. If you could see the polyester outfit I'm wearing right now... hooboy, and the hat! Thank you for reading on Labour Day. Would you like some actual MMOG information with that?
$790 Billion ISK has been stolen, lifted, heisted, puloined, taken, pilfered, misappropriated, swiped, snatched, nabbed, filched! Probably worth more than the GNP of some third-world nations, this EVE Online currency was absconded with by a player who ran a bank in the increasingly popular online game. The event caused such a stir that our own Phil Comeau was invited to a press conference to get the facts.
Phil wore his best "Dr. Evil" outfit and pinky to his mouth continually interrupted the proceedings by yelling out, "One Billion!". Before they carted him out 
of the proceedings he did get a superb report together. Way to go Phil! Next time take the inflatable "mini-me" doll with you for best effect.
Not willing to give Phil all of the "dress up" duties, Karen Hertzberg was off to a Renaissance Faire which is of course a reason to dress in no way similar to the way people dressed during that period and hit each other with foam swords. Included in Karen's article is a picture of a woman dressed only in a skin-tight leotard and leaves who appears to be ready to eat a small red-headed child. She may also have been selling lemonade (the lure for the children) at $3.50 a glass. Clickity click click to see what I mean.
The community manager on our Dungeons and Dragons Online site didn't waste time dressing up, he went straight to the arguing. Of course Danny has called it debating and he's doling out $200 in prizes for those that "debate" the best. Danny calls this the "DM Debate Challenge". I just call it the make our DDO forums look like the Official WoW Forums contest.
Segue to our own rodeo clown and master debater, Jeff Woleslagle, who takes a look at games that don't fit into the MMO genre. Apparently there are times when you just need a break from whacking rats to crash cars or throw footballs.
Last, but not least there is Thurston Hillman, our resident furry specialist who would like you to pick his race in Warhammer Online. Yiffing in mind, I told him Lizardmen probably were his most appropriate choice. Vote now! Vote often!
To those of you working today, please try to enjoy your Labour Day. To those of you enjoying the last day of your summer vacation, please enjoy your Labour Daze.
Post a comment at the bottom of this blog. If you are shy (or female and sending in naughty pictures) you can E-Mail me.
Every good guild needs a home. A home free of gold ads, secondary market farmers. Look no further than GuildPortal.com.
Exclusive new TenTonHammer.com Content!
Let us entertain you or at the very least waste some of your time at work.09.04.2006 Exclusive Content
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Op/Ed: MMO Burnout! Causes and Cures
"Too much of a good thing? It's possible! And the best time to try out some not-so-MMO gaming is during September and October, when developers start bringing out their latest efforts in time for the Christmas season. Ethec offers his most anticipated mainstream games to help you keep up your gaming mojo when your favorite MMORPG leaves you feeling temporarily toasted." -
Dungeons and Dragons Online: "DM Debate Challenge" Contest
"Sure, DDO @ Ten Ton Hammer is the ONLY site on the 'Net that brings you fresh new Dungeons & Dragons Online content each week. Sure, we tell it like it is and aren't afraid to ruffle feathers at Turbine if that's what it takes to make DDO the best Dungeons & Dragons-based game ever. Sure, we bring you guides, editorials, interviews, screenshots, and DDO-themed desktop wallpapers. Sure, we do all of that, but what have we done for you lately?How about giving away almost $200 in DDO, D&D, and Eberron prizes? That's right: DDO @ Ten Ton Hammer, your #1 source for all things DDO, is giving away game cards, D&D dice and Eberron books! All you have to do is speak your mind--just like we do. We'll be looking for you forum posts about DDO-related topics. Post some constructive criticism or a logical account of DDO's accolades. All we ask is that the post be relevant to the topic and be respectful of other people. It's OK to disagree; just don't be rude! Here's how to get it done:" -
Dungeons and Dragons Online: What DDO Players Do Between Sessions Of Their Favourite Game
"What do DDO players do when they need a break from DDO or don't have the time for one of those intensive high-level quests? We examine a number of the other games DDO subscribers play and evaluate how those games impact DDO." -
EVE Online: Don't Bank On It
"CCPâs Chief Market Officer Magnus Bergsson takes some time to discuss the recent incident involving the EVE Intergalactic Bank heist of 790 Billion ISK â allegedly!Snippet: âThe EVE Intergalactic Bank (EIB) â noble idea come to ruin, or a scam from the get-go? Either way, many players lost billions in what has been revealed as the largest in-game heist of ISK ever seen in the virtual world of EVE Online. In the beginning, things were good. Deposits were made, interest was paid out, and the shareholders were happy. There were equal amounts of players on the forums, some screaming âScam!â, others defending the EIB as a good thing, and all around both parties, countless players screaming, âRabble! Rabblerabblerabblerabble!â for good measure.The nay-sayers were proven right one ominous day, when owner âCallyâ posted details in the official EVE Online message boards showing how he had just made off with 790 Billion ISK (no, thatâs not a typo or misprint) in EIB assets. Public outcry since that day has been understandably vocal! In the wake of this event, CCP decided to hold a small online press conference to discuss some of the details, as they know them, of⦠ISKGate? I need a catchier name hereâ¦â" -
EverQuest 2: Polygamery
"What is it with gamers having to play a million games at once? What are they playing and why? Kiara pretends she has a clue and talks a bit about what other games are out there and her theories on why gamers can't have just one. And no, it has nothing to do with potato chips." -
Vanguard: Saga Of Heroes - EverQuesting - The Origins Of Vanguard Fans
"Are Vanguard: Saga of Heroes fans living in a fantasy? Shayalyn's visit to a renaissance fair reminded her of her love for the fantasy MMOG genre. Considering the games most Vanguard fans are currently playing, its' clear that she's not alone. Check out the editorial that asks the all-important question: Where do Vanguard fans come from?" -
Warhammer Onlne: Road To 7th Edition Poll
" To go along with Episode #1 of the 'Road to 7th Edition' article series, Ratboy has posted in the TenTonHammer Warhammer Online with a new poll requesting reader input on what army he should choose for his new project. This means that you get to voice your thoughts on what evil road Ratboy should pursue in his plans of madness. Check out the forum thread and give Ratboy a vote and some thoughts to go along with it. Consider it your charitable act for the day! " -
Warhammer Online: WoW For Now
"This week's common content article looks at the different games that Warhammer Online fans have been keeping themselves occupied with over the past few months since Warhammer Online has been announced. The prediction is good for Games-Workshop, and good for Blizzard!? Read on to find why..." -
World of Warcraft: Variety In Gaming
"This week's common content is all about the games you play beside your favorite MMORPG. In this case it's World of Warcraft, the most popular MMORPG out there. What games do the players play along side WoW? We answer this question in our latest article, Variety in Gaming."
Vin Diesel Fact of the Day - Vin Diesel regularly wins drag races...on foot.
Now from the real world. You can't make this stuff up.
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Bartender Gets $10,000 Tip [Thanks Karen]
Gaming editor still awaits first dollar. -
Sting-Ray Kills Crocodile Hunter [Thanks Danny]
Crikey! He will be missed. -
Opera Singer In Finland Beaten-up By A Squirrel
His career is Finn-ished. -
Shaving Habits Linked To Stroke Risk
A shave a day, keeps the coroner away. -
China To Build Bruce Lee Amusement Park
Bruce Lee was born in San Francisco.
As always, thanks for visiting TenTonHammer.com,
-- John "Boomjack" Hoskin
