The Repetition of Gaming

By: Paul "Slide" Shortt

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Have you taken a walk around Norrath and actually looked around? I mean, yeah you've traveled from the Coldwind shores, to the Ruins of Varsoon, to the dusty streets of Maj Dul and back again, but have you actually "looked"?

I happened to be doing just this the other day. I was taking a stroll through Antonica when the realization hit me. "Someone is carbon copying everything!" then I paniced and ran around in circles flapping my arms wildly. How could this have slipped my attention for so long? I walked along the Qeynos highway stopping to take a look at all of the wildlife in it's duplicated splendor. All the badgers were of exactly the same height, and color. Scarecrows were identical right down to the last straw. Even all of the gnolls barked and breathed the same. What was going on? How could I not have noticed such replication until now?

I began killing the abominations of nature one by one, nuking each fuzzy mammal with disease damaging spells. As I continued my blood bath I noticed that more creatures of exactly the same shape and size started appearing in the destroyed creatures' places as if out of thin air.

I decided it was time to investigate. I ran back to the city and stopped off at my inn room in Starcrest to pick up my trusty magnifying glass that came free with my Capt. Varlos Crunch cereal. The first person I saw as I walked out of my room was Jerben Sleepwell.

I began to ask a question. "Hey Jerben have you ever notic.."

"It's been so long since I've had one of my wife's special desserts!" He interrupted. "I want some crunchies! Will you help me get more crunchies?"

"Not a problem Jerben," I started, "but first let me ask you about this weird stuff that... "

"It's been so long since I've had one of my wife's special desserts!" Jerben interrupted yet again.

"I know I know you just told me." I stated as my level of annoyance began to rise. "I was just in Antonica a minute ago and..."

"I want some more crunchies! Will you help me get more crunchies?" Jerban repeated.

I stared at Sleepwell from across the counter dumbfounded. "Do0d, I seriously just got you some crunchies last week."

At that moment another adventurer, not unlike myself ran through the door with an armfull of crunchies and dropped them on the table in front of Jerben. The inkeeper robotically reached into his coin-purse and handed the explorer some copper and scooped the crunchies into his pocket.

Jerben Sleepwell looked at me with a blank stare and begain speaking. "I want some more crunchies! Will you help me get more crunchies?"

"Oh... my... God" I said softly as the horror sunk in deeper and deeper. Things were worse than I thought. I knew I had given Sleepwell crunchies multiple times in the past, but for some reason I still really wanted to help him. NO! I must resist!

I lunged across the counter and punched Jerben square in the jaw with an audible crack. The innkeeper barely even flinched. No one else in the room even acknowledged the violent action.

I ran out of the establishment wide eyed and completely freaked out. As I looked around I saw more and more actions being repeated by the city folk. Vandis and Oomitelmora were still playing chess. Had they ever moved? EVER?? Merchants never moved, Guards paced back and forth saying things like "Duty above all else, citizen" and "Greetings, citizen. I am on guard duty." I really needed to sit down for a second. Spotting a barrel near by I walked over to it and tried to sit down, but instead was forced down on my knees.

"What the... " I began to say as I lept back up.

I tried sitting down again only to find the same result! A female Erudite ran by and I grabbed her by the arm stopping her.

"Wait please!" I yelled.

Obviously startled the Erudite heroine yelled back. "Hey, let go of my arm!"

"Sorry," I appologized "but have you noticed anything strange about this place?"

"No," she answered simply.

"Would you do me a favor and sit down?" I asked cautiously.

The Erudite looked at me blankly for a moment and then got on her knees. "There are you happy?" she asked.

"No I need you to SIT DOWN." I explained emphatically.

"I am sitting down you freak." said the bothered girl. The Erudite jumped up and ran off into city on some self important agenda.

I stood there in the middle of Starcrest Commune in complete astonishment. No one knew what was going on in this world of robotic echos. If I tried to show anyone the truth, I would most certainly be dubbed a heritic and hung on site.

I burried my head in my hands and sighed. There was no way that I could live like this knowing what I now knew. There was only one thing I could do. I began my trek out to Valen's Tower. The journey was a short one, but the climb was difficult. I stood at the edge of the cliff, spread my arms and threw myself off to certain death.

I passed out before I hit the ground. I remember this because I woke up moments later at the North Qeynos gates. The realization that I could never die was too much to handle as the anger built up like an approaching freight train. My anger released toward one of the nearby Qeynos guards through my clenched fist as it found itself mangling the man's helmet. The guard was about to defend himself when everything froze in place.

The air went still and all sound dissappeared into some unseen void. Everything began to fade into a sea of unending white. I spun around only to see the same thing behind me; nothingness. Just then I saw a figure approaching in the far distance. It seemed like forever as the figure slowly grew, drawing nearer and nearer. I could tell that it was a human male and wore a black leather jacket and jeans. Finally the man reached me and extended his hand in greeting.

"Hail some do0d!" I exclaimed as I shook his outstretched hand.

"Hail to you Slide!" The man said returning the greeting. "I'm Scott Hartsman, producer for EverQuest 2. We've been monitoring your activities over the past couple of hours."

I looked around nervously, leaned in toward the enigmatic man and whispered "So, you know what the hell is going on around here with all the duplicity?"

The man stood there looking Ominous and replied "Yep, I sure do, but you aren't supposed to. Unfortunately there are a few players like youself who..."

"Wait wait wait," I interrupted, "What do you mean players?"

Scott looked back at me quizzically. "You mean you don't know that this is a game?"

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. "No! This is no game Mr. Hartsman and I demand some answers!"

The leather jacket wearing man shook his head sadly. "Here take this," as he handed me a bottled water and a yellow pill with the word "BANNED stamped across it in red. "when you wake up everything will be all better."

I took the pill which caused everything to go fuzzy. Scott was waving to me and then everything went black.

I woke up suddenly and found myself on the floor of the Starcrest Inn with a pounding headache.

"What's up Jerben?" I asked the inkeeper as I rubbed my aching head. "How did I get here?"

Jerben just smiled and replied "It's been so long since I've had one of my wife's special desserts! I want some crunchies! Will you help me get more crunchies?"

"Sure thing man." I smiled, "BRB."