Welcome to this twenty-eighth day of October, 2014. I’m John “Boomjack” Hoskin and this is Here Comes The Boom – EP #27.
So much to write about… so much that I simply can’t begin to comprehend. Like, why this is the #1 trending video on YouTube right now.
When this should be…
Or why, this little clip is hard to turn off.
Twitch In The Nude
Twitch, you know those guys and gals right? The ones who let anybody stream their gameplay on the Internet for millions upon billions of potential viewers? Turns out people were watching the sexually stuff. Who knew?
Apparently Twitch didn’t, or… turned a blind eye until now. Their Terms of Service are changing. Go ahead and click to read if you want, but I’ll boil the initial four paragraphs of that TOS down for you.
Insert Twitch Voice: We do what we want and don’t need to give reasons why.
This is Twitch.
This is also Twitch.
Last Twitch… I promise.
The point is… it’s their party and their rules and sometimes the I Do What I Want attitude is entertaining. It can be as entertaining as the sexually suggestive stuff that has apparently been going on all over Twitch unbeknownst to those who reign supreme in the land where people stream at 4am with two viewers to show for it.
The real question is, what are we going to do without quality content like Tara Babcock’s
How To Get Your Girlfriend Into Gaming
Or more importantly her cult favourite..
Losing My Virginity – Goat Simulator
So… just to be clear… direct from the Twitch TOS
Nerds are sexy, and you're all magnificent, beautiful creatures, but let's try and keep this about the games, shall we?
Wearing no clothing or sexually suggestive clothing - including lingerie, swimsuits, pasties, and undergarments - is prohibited, as well as any full nude torsos*, which applies to both male and female broadcasters. You may have a great six-pack, but that's better shared on the beach during a 2-on-2 volleyball game blasting "Playing with the Boys."
* If it's unbearably hot where you are, and you happen to have your shirt off (guys) or a bikini top (grills), then just crop the webcam to your face. Problem solved.
We sell t-shirts, and those are always acceptable. #Kappa”
Vulgar language is still allowed, so have at it. Show us what you’re made of (or not made of as the case may be.)
There appear to be no such nudity or sexually suggestion bans on other services, so expect KaceyTron and Tara to be signed up with competing services posthaste. Here comes the Dance Dance Revolution Mario Mix Review complete with the cleavage cam!!!
Now on to something more entertaining
Vin Diesel Fact: There is no I in team. There are two in Vin Diesel.
Because the real world is usually more humorous than the virtual one. Here are some real world stories. You can’t make this stuff up.
- From the Dunkin-Do-Not-Do-That-Dept. – Hunters Baiting Bears With Donuts
- From the Urine-Trouble-Dept. – Peeing Into a Particle Accelerator
If you received even an iota of enjoyment from this then please support both myself and TenTonHammer by doing one of more of the following:
- Read my previous columns
- HCTB 26: Memories and Moments
- HCTB 25: Winners and Losers – Iron Tide
- HCTB 24: First World Gamer Problems
- HCTB 23: Strongbad is Back
- HCTB 22: Free Steam Keys
- HCTB 21: Destiny Bounty Guides
- HCTB 20: Destiny Video Farming Guides
- HCTB 19: Casino Cave Closed
- HCTB 18: Why Light Is Important in Destiny
- HCTB 17: Do You Like Green Engrams?
- HCTB 16: Destiny Is A Nursery Rhyme
- HCTB 15: Is This My Destiny?
- HCTB 14: Censored
- HCTB 13: Hype and Hope
- HCTB 12: Irritated by Ice Bucket Challenge
- HCTB 11: Censored
- HCTB 10: I Got Fireflied
- HCTB 9: Gaming Junkets, Do We Need Them?
- HCTB 8: Need For Speed or Gaming Gourmand
- HCTB 7: Every Breath You Take
- HCTB 6: Dear LPBs and Twitch
- HCTB 5: Comments
- HCTB 4: If MMO Fans Were World Cup Fans
- HCTB 3: Censored
- HCTB 2: Censored
- HCTB 1: EA vs Activision
- Follow me on Twitter (@BoomjackTTH)
- Whitelist us if you use adblocking software
- Comment below (even a “this sucks” will do)
Thanks again. I appreciate your support. Who’s awesome? You’re awesome!