by Chris Noll on Dec 29, 2009
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For a single 32-year-old editor with no holiday family commitments,
Christmas is enjoyed about as much as a dutch grandmother enjoys Senior
Prom. She may smile and be polite, but in the end it's just a bunch of
people having fun around her, and she doesn't
style="font-style: italic;">really understand why. This
Christmas was a special one though. Find out why in Loading...
Multiplayer Miracles.
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Whilst my colleagues and majority of my friends were visiting family or
opening presents under the tree this weekend I sat at home wishing I
had remembered to buy enough food to stay nourished during the 48-hour
international and civic lockdown known as Christmas. Even more, I
wished I had gotten around to building that robotic pal from the
internet so I would have someone to play a game with. Then, a true
Christmas miracle happened. I received a very special Christmas present
from Ten Ton Hammer's Matt Lowery in the form of a Steam Gift. It was
style="font-style: italic;">Borderlands.
We had reviewed
style="font-style: italic;">Borderlands
a little earlier this year, but I hadn't had the chance to play it
myself. Eric Campbell got the office copy for the review (which, by the
way, I still think was a grave injustice. Someone was
style="font-style: italic;">obviously
playing favorites in trade for powerleveling.) Matt was on my side
though, and decided to take it upon himself to right the wrong and get
me my very own copy. "We'll play together!" he said excitedly, as we
jumped up and down giggling gleefully in a field of daisies and clovers.
My celebrations were shattered when only later did I find out that
Matt, too, was a normal person and had family and friends that he
wanted to spend time with during the holidays. This isn't a slight
against Matt. In fact, I would have felt bad if he had played with me
over the holidays. My point simply being that again I found myself
alone, with a shiny new toy in hand and nobody to play with. Tears
welling in my eyes, I sat down, rested my head on my hands and stared
distantly at the download progress bar in Steam. 64%... 65%... The bar
treaded onward. I knew that soon enough I'd have this great new game
but even so the numbers held no meaning any more. 66%... 67%... Oh, why
didn't I fight for that relationship all those years ago to avoid being
alone today? 68%... 69%... If only I had gotten her to play
style="font-style: italic;">EverQuest
we'd still be together. 70%... 71%... Or maybe I could get a pet
of some sort. Are koalas available in Canada? 72%... 73%... OH! I
forgot I have Oreos!
After gorging on chocolately goodness, I sat back down in front of the
PC. The game was ready to play. Bachelor blues be damned, I was
determined to have a good time. As I booted up the game and picked
chunks of chocolate cookie out of my teeth I heard the unmistakeable
chime of MSN Messenger. A little puzzled as to who could possibly be so
pathetic as to be on MSN during the holidays, I tabbed out to see who
it was.
"Hey man, I got Borderlands
and a couple hours free. Wanna play?" It was main site writer, Jason
Bolton.
"No WAI!" I exclaimed, cookie crumbs spattering across my screen. The
second Christmas miracle had just happened.
We hurriedly jumped into Ventrilo after a quick drive out to the field
of daisies and clovers to do our giggling man-dance and booted up the
game. In no time we were distributing fear among the residents of
Pandora and having the time of our lives. The hours flew by and
eventually the inevitable came to be, and Medawky said he had to go.
"No problem, man. Thanks for playing today," I told him.
"It was my pleasure, dude," he replied.
"And Jason?"
"Yes?"
"I love you, man."
There was an awkward few seconds of silence ended by Jason saying "ok
then! Have a good one." I believe in my heart that he felt the
Christmas miracle too.
The day turned out alright. I was content. At that point I would have
said "yes, for sure miracles can happen," and I probably would have
believed it for a little while. But nothing prepared me for what
happened next. The third and final miracle was about to unfold.
Bla-bloo-boop (that's onomatopeia for the sound MSN Messenger makes
when you have a new message). I figured it was probably just Jason
wanting to say "I love you too, man," but much to my surprise, it was
someone completely different. It was returning contributing writer,
Jeff Francis!
"Dude, I heard Matt got you Borderlands.
Wanna play?"
"DOOOOD!" I exclaimed as I started putting on my shoes again in
preparation for the field of daisies and clovers.
And that's how my Christmas weekend ended. Jeff and I have been playing
Borderlands
every night for the past few nights. And it's been awesome. We eat
Oreos and shoot things in the head in a cooperative effort to bring
order to the chaos that is Pandora. Next week, I think I'm going to ask
Jeff if he wants to take our relationship to the next level and do an
all-nighter of Borderlands.
So, dear readers, I'm here to say that Christmas Miracles do happen.
Even to a 32-year-old bachelor editor like me. With some good friends,
Oreos, and some good games, miracles can happen to you too.
Have your own miracle you want to share? Tell us in the forums.
3 new Ten Ton Hammer
features today! 122 in December! 2,304 in
2009!
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