by John Hoskin on Apr 02, 2008
Welcome to the 800th Edition of Loading...
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Daily Column
Loading... it's a laugh riot, though usually only one of those two things at a time.
First, the Ten Ton Pulse, your finger on the beating heart of the MMOG industry.
If the Top 10 isn't enough, we now show the Top 20 and Top 50 lists as well, available to everyone on our homepage. (What is Pulse?)
Age of Conan - 200 BPM World of Warcraft - 170 BPM EverQuest 2 - 59 BPM Warhammer Online - 42 BPM Lord of the Rings Online - 41 BPM EVE Online - 35 BPM Lineage 2 - 31 BPM Guild Wars - 29 BPM Tabula Rasa - 25 BPM Vanguard - 24 BPMAs you can see from the Pulse, yesterday was an enormous day for traffic here at Ten Ton Hammer. We set a new record for unique users in one day. Well done folks! A large part of the community was viewing our latest contest called, "AoC 4 Life" You won't find an Age of Conan contest cooler than this. You have my guarantee!
"Age of Conan is almost here, and Ten Ton Hammer is teaming with FUNCOM to bring you the contest of a lifetime! In the Ten Ton Hammer AoC 4Life contest, 10 people will score beta keys. 5 of those lucky beta key winners will also get a copy of the collector's edition of Age of Conan: Hyborian Adventures. 1 will go on to get the collector's edition plus an autographed framed Age of Conan concept art. And one extremely lucky contestant will walk away with a collector's edition signed by FUNCOM founder and Age of Conan Game Director Gaute Godager and a lifetime subscription to the Age of Conan.
You read it right. One lucky S.O.B. will get the game free, it'll be signed by Gaute Godager, and that gamer will never have to pay a penny for Age of Conan for life!"
I can't believe that one of our staff used "S.O.B." in a contest description. Phil...please bring your iron fist to the lunch room. We have some educating to do!
I landed in Vegas only to find that what I thought was poorly played and obvious April Fool's joke had tricked quite a few people. Your heartfelt good-byes brought a tear to my eye. Thank you for all of your kind words. Unfortunately, you can't get rid of me that quickly, though you did get me sent to the desert.
Travel for me is like covered in honey and thrown in a pit of fire ants. I never seem to have an uneventful trip and this flight was no different. I was the lucky recipient of a seat that had no latch to keep it in the "locked and upright" position. The moment the captain cranked the engines for take-off, my seat flew back, my feet flew up and "Whoaaaaaa!" flew out of my mouth. Every time that the plane would climb during the flight my seat would slide back into the lap of the passenger seated behind me, who being a good traveler himself would kick the seat to get me to refrain from lounging.
Said traveler also became known as Freddy McFartALot, his noxious fumes permeating every pore of every passenger on the plane until many were praying to go down in a enormous fireball. Phil, seated in Row 2 on the aisle (that's first class for those of you like myself who have never been privileged enough to get that close to the front of a plane) had flight attendants wafting gardenias in his nose for the entire five hour trip and didn't even know that while he was getting his feet rubbed, the rest of us were gasping for air like trout on a riverbank.
The hotel is fantastic however and the waitresses are angels, at least that's how Coyote described angels to me and he has never steered me wrong. Neither have the guys at Teh Gladiators comic, which just happens to have a new strip up today. See what I did there, I segued from one kind of strip to another.
Karen Hertzberg, an angel of another kind, was thoughtful enough to send me the "New MMOG Exclusives" list today, which saves me a boatload of time while I'm here in Vegas. She got smart and tried to Major Topper me by breaking down the content by type. Unfortunately, she is averse to alphabetical order, the system by which I have trained myself and in turn you the reader. We're not as adaptable as you think Karen, Ms. Smartybrain!
Alphabetical or chaotic? The The Loading... forums await you.
Do you feel the need to contact me personally with naughty pictures or derogatory comments? Here's my E-mail.
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21 new MMOG hand-crafted articles today! 21 in April! 775 in 2008!
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Game Over Podcast 15: MMO Games and Enhancement Drugs Warhammer Online: Career Preview Video with Adam Gershowitz - The Swordmaster Warhammer Online: Career Preview Video with Adam Gershowitz - The Disciple ofReal World News
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- John "Boomjack" Hoskin and the Ten Ton Hammer Team