EP 29: 36 Warlords of Draenor Facts
Welcome to this thirtieth day of October, 2014. I’m John “Boomjack” Hoskin and this is Here Comes The Boom – EP #29
First off, a woman walked through NYC for 10 hours and was harassed. I’m not condoning this behaviour, but the “test” was also far from scientific and almost assuredly an attention grab for reasons other than what it purports.
With that in mind.
10 Hours of Walking in NYC as a Man.
35 Warlords of Draenor Facts
- The expansion drops on 13.11.2014. (Virtual lineups of this digital product will begin a 00:01. We call them a queue and on Area-52 they will be bigger than Rosie O’Donnell’s appetite.)
- The level cap is increasing by 10 to 100. (Someone will reach that cap by 00:01 and by 00:02 there will be over 2,000 threads in the official forums complaining about that the person doesn’t have a life, even though they only took up one minute of it leveling.)
- Every new level will give you upgrades to core spells. (Which is far less confusing than, say, new spells)
- There will be seven new zones. (Each zone is named after a Dwarf. The least populated will be Happy.)
- Character models from Burning Crusade and Vanilla WoW are upgraded. (By upgraded we mean changed.)
- You can turn off the new character models in your settings panel. (See #5)
- There are no realm first leveling achievement in WoD. (Complaint will be filed by player 00:01)
- A silver medal in proving grounds will be required to queue for Heroic Dungeons. (Coming in 2nd never felt so good. You’re the first loser! Talladega Nights Baby! That just happened!)
- At level 100 you will get a new talent choice. (From three indistinguishable options)10.Heirlooms will be account wide and cross realm accessible via a tab similar to pets or mounts. (Or you could boost)
- Toys, like heirlooms will now be available to all characters. (What? You don’t like me dropping this train set? Chugga Chugga, Chew, Chew!)
- Toys will no longer take up bag space. (Thank you train set Gods)
- Battle pets can be bred to produce epic battle pets. (Battle Pet Puppy Mills)
- Stat numbers are squished. (You will no longer have 8 bajillion hit points. )
- Cloud serpent riding will not become account wide. (And nobody wept.)
- All mounts will be usable as ground mounts. (Mimiron’s Head coming to a Drive-Thru Near You)
- A dragonfly mount is incoming. (Because who hasn’t wanted to ride a dragonfly?)
- You can summon a random mount from a list of favourites.
- There is no flying in Draenor until patch 6.1. (But your mounts all work on the ground. Huzzah!)
- Garrisons will act like player housing. (For the lonely)
- Followers in garrisons will be able to farm and craft for you. (Like slaves)
- Quest items will no longer take up space in your inventory.
- Purchasing WoD gives you a free boosted character to 90. (Because nobody has had time to get to 90 yet)
- There are no new races or classes. (Except the race to 100)
- Raids are being completely overhauled. (Because they weren’t confusing enough)
- Stats on gear will change with your spec. No need to carry two sets of gear. (Or Quest items apparently)
- Reforging is removed. (R.I.P. AskMrRobot.)
- Meta gems and socket bonuses are being removed. (Matching colours is hard work)
- Dynamic events are coming to WoD. (Warhammer Online called. They want their idea back.)
- R.I.P. – hit, parry, doge and expertise. (Gone, gone, gone, Hallelujah they are gone. You still have to attack from the back.)
- Non-essential stats (for now) are being added. Cleave, speed, sturdiness and lifesteal are the current suspects.
- Racial traits are revamped taking away any racial advantages, or so they say. (Tauren still rule)
- The Adventurer’s guild, similar to the armory will guide you based on your characters’ gear, progression, etc. (Also known as the hand-holders or guidance counsellor’s guild)
- There are eight new dungeons. (LFG + Leeroy Jenkins for the first two weeks)
- There are two new raids with 16 new bosses. (See above)
- There will be outdoor bosses. (Finally!!!!!! These abominable walls have been getting in the way of my greatness!)
The Zones of Warlords of Draenor
Now on to something more entertaining
Vin Diesel Fact: Cats have Vin Diesel like reflexes.
Because the real world is usually more humorous than the virtual one. Here are some real world stories. You can’t make this stuff up.
- From the Top-Un-Dept. – North Korean Leader in Fighter Jet
- From the I-Fell-On-It-Dept. – Man Has Eel-like Fish Surgically Removed From Bum.
If you received even an iota of enjoyment from this then please support both myself and TenTonHammer by doing one of more of the following:
- Read my previous columns
- HCTB 28: All About That Base
- HCTB 27: Sexually Suggestive Content Gets Twitched
- HCTB 26: Memories and Moments
- HCTB 25: Winners and Losers – Iron Tide
- HCTB 24: First World Gamer Problems
- HCTB 23: Strongbad is Back
- HCTB 22: Free Steam Keys
- HCTB 21: Destiny Bounty Guides
- HCTB 20: Destiny Video Farming Guides
- HCTB 19: Casino Cave Closed
- HCTB 18: Why Light Is Important in Destiny
- HCTB 17: Do You Like Green Engrams?
- HCTB 16: Destiny Is A Nursery Rhyme
- HCTB 15: Is This My Destiny?
- HCTB 14: Censored
- HCTB 13: Hype and Hope
- HCTB 12: Irritated by Ice Bucket Challenge
- HCTB 11: Censored
- HCTB 10: I Got Fireflied
- HCTB 9: Gaming Junkets, Do We Need Them?
- HCTB 8: Need For Speed or Gaming Gourmand
- HCTB 7: Every Breath You Take
- HCTB 6: Dear LPBs and Twitch
- HCTB 5: Comments
- HCTB 4: If MMO Fans Were World Cup Fans
- HCTB 3: Censored
- HCTB 2: Censored
- HCTB 1: EA vs Activision
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